So…. I’ve been given a computer. Toshiba laptop, hand-me-down. Nothing special you know…. But I can’t even begin to describe how excited I am to finally consolidate all of my music digitally. So great. Welcome to the world of mixes, playlists, DJ-ing for myself…. Good good good. Also what that means for you is it makes it a heck of a lot easier for me to keep up a little better on the blog. I don’t have interweb at home but I can type something up and give it the ol’ copy-paste when I get a chance. So… good news for you right? I guess… that is if anyone reads this anymore….

So as I’ve mentioned there’ve been a number of things over here that have been frustrating. Also lots that’s been awesome. “Stuff” has levelled out over the last few weeks. I quit the music team at church. Now… the old people didn’t like me much. I can deal with that. But my pastor was still pushing me to be “contemporary” at the same time as make them happy and it simply doesn’t work. Even having a conversation about the “style” of worship seems so petty to me. I feel like the feel of the music and the atmosphere of the church should be fuelled from the inside out not artificially created to try to keep a church alive. I don’t know maybe I’m off the rails but that’s how I’m feeling about it. Be who you are… who God made you… and figure the people who don’t like it will find fellowship with people they do understand and relate to. The more transparent you are the quicker it will be realized, which is good. What that means for WBCC? Stop trying to be artificially relevant to a phantom audience you wish you had… and feed the people who are invested in the church. I don’t know though.

It’s labour day here…. It’s freaking beautiful outside. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this but the colours here are extra intense because of the UV index thingamajig. We’re right under the hole in the ozone I think. New Zealand has the highest rate of skin cancer in the world, or so they tell me. The other effect of that is the difference between shade and sun even on a hot day is huge. Hopefully we’re pretty well out of the rain now.

I spoke at men’s breakfast a couple of weeks ago. There were about 15 guys in the room. I was the only one under 55. Felt a little awkward.

Saturday night I went to a show up in the Coromandel with a few mates. Katchafire and Opensouls. Got home at 3 am. It was pretty fun. It was at this place called the Coroglen tavern… some random little bar with a sweet outdoor venue out the back. Opensouls was pretty gospel/soul and Katchafire is straight reggae. I have a special warm place in my heart for reggae but after about an hour of it I was ready to shoot myself. Reggae shows sure get heaps of fascinating and unique individuals though. You’ve got your tranced-out stoned types, total hippies, moms… the whole spectrum. I do appreciate that.

I’m trying to work out my schedule for the first part of next year and I’m in a bit of a quandary…. I want to go to Samoa for a couple of months and build. Habitat for Humanity is organizing teams to go and I think it would be a cool thing to do. But… I’m not sure when. I kind of want to go to Samoa in February and March, then back to OR for a bit around April. The other option is to come to the states in Feb and hit Samoa a little later in the year… but the climate shock to come from dead of summer here to dead of winter there would be… traumatic. However certain people who are quite close to me are getting married in February and March and it would be cool to be there. I guess either way it doesn’t really matter too much. Samoa probably needs the help sooner but I’m sure there will still be plenty to do a bit later on. Maybe I’ll pop round to Tonga as well. I got a taste of island culture in Guam but just a little taste. It would be pretty fun to hang out in the islands, build during the day and play guitars around the campfire at night. Eat coconuts and pineapples… get bit by mosquitoes…swim in the ocean. Sounds alright. For a little while anyway.

Sorry it's been a while

So what's happening..... the last month as been packed busy, between people visiting, a road trip, work at church and otherwise. I'm trying to learn how to do this thing. The thing being life. Honestly right now I'm over it. The learning being learning how to give it to God rather than taking the yoke upon myself. I really, really, have no room to complain. At a point right now where I'm reevaluating... just about everything of who I am and who He wants me to become. Somebody asked me what my passion was the other day and I couldn't really answer.... because I feel like I don't know anymore. Do I have a heart for youth? Do I care about music? Do I even care about other people? Who am I? The word for this season has been that God is building me, strengthening me. It sucks. I'm not exactly what the leadership of the church was expecting. Or quite what they want. I could get started and go on and on about their issues and why they're wrong and all that, and a lot of would be correct and valid. But it doesn't matter. My part in this season is to stay faithful, and see what God does as a result of it. It's easy to see why people I've met have been jaded by working for the church... church as we know it can be such an institution, and the growth and sustenance of the church has become synonymous with the growth and sustenance of Christ. Ideally they should be the same but unfortunately in a broken world.... keeping a "church" alive and impacting people in the name of Christ can be pretty opposite. Spent a couple of nights at my YWAM base, they're running a DTS now... what did I find? YWAM is great. Absolutely awesome but I'm not a lifer. It's easy to fall into a YWAM arrogance. Easy to think you've seen the way God can really work and church isn't doing it. But however hard the path may be... commitment to the bride of Christ and helping her learn how to serve Him is a pretty noble cause. Harder than doing it the YWAM way for sure. i won't be staying with this church any longer than I'd planned. I don't want to be on the extreme end of a church culture spectrum, I want to fit into one. I'm still pursuing staying here in New Zealand. There's building to be done, also I might see about getting some outdoor education certifications and teaching rock climbing or something. Basically right now I'm slogging through. On the other end I know I'll look back and see something that couldn't have happened otherwise. Pray for me.